Well it just occurred to me that I hardly pray for myself when I am sick. Perhaps when driven to desperation then I might remember I have my God to turn to in prayer. Even then, I hardly expect God to answer MY prayer immediately or at all for healing of fever, sore throat or whatever ailment I might be having.I expect the illness to take its full course without divine intervention. Perhaps I've been disappointed too many times with "unanswered" prayers also (why no healing NOW? I want it NOW!). Yes, we live in a fallen world and diseases are just part of the consequential package. I don't expect God to rescue me every time from every illness. So I just simply hardly, pray for myself when I'm ill. I'm okay with no miracles.
Sigh. This shows clearly how much I believe in God and His ability to answer my prayer (be it a Yes, No or Later). It shows how well or little I know Him in reality. If I TRULY BELIEVE that God loves me and He HEARS me, every single simple prayer for help, why don't I pray to Him more, talk to Him more? Will He actually comfort me when I am down? Will He really remove my fear and give me courage? Was that effort in being bold just my raw guts alone or His supernatural strength? Well I don't know, but I think it'd be good to start with child-like faith. Just simply trust Him. He is real.
Lord, I want to believe. Help me in my unbelief!
-I've got this mild fever since Monday. It's been yo-yo-ing up and down each day. And my throat feels swollen. Could be throat or tonsil infection. I HAVE to pray for myself, yes...
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